When You're Gone
by Runs With Horses
Summary: Sequel to Holy Water! Things will get worse and even more complicated. Full summery inside! Male/Male SLASH! Looking for a Co-Author. Interested? PM me!
1. Chapter 1

**Authors Note****:**

**Hello all, I know I promised that I would never kill Bella but I couldn't resist. This idea was attacking my mind. It was telling me to write it. I actually began it in my Survey of World Religions class, I mean I ignored the lecture and wrote out the preface and modeled the rest (That _NEVER_ happens). This is the Sequel to Holy Water!**

**Summery:**

**Set in New Moon. Edward/Jacob SLASH! Male on Male! **

**Bella get's close to Jake when Edward leaves and finds him less scary. She gets over her fear of him but says that he WILL NOT touch her. When Bella goes cliff diving she does it to kill herself and Jake can't get there in time, Bella drowns. She comes back though as a ghost and can't understand why. Alice knows she's a ghost, and pleads with her to help save Edward from going to the Volturi to ask to be killed. **

**Edward finds about about Bella killing herself and wants to follow her. When he goes to the Volturi how will his mind be changed? **

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Chapter One- Pain and Sorrow

Bella POV

Rain slapped my face, mixing with my tears as I looked out over the cliff. I heard the waves crash against the cliff. They thrashed and fought with one another for who will take me down...to my end.

I heard my angels voice again...for the last time, _"Bella, step away. Please don't do this,"_ he begged his voice soft.

"I can't. I won't live without you, but you won't live with me," I said out loud. It didn't matter anymore if I talked to voices. It wouldn't matter anymore that I'm insane. It would all be over soon.

"_Please,"_ he begged.

I stepped closer to the edge of the cliff looking at the cold black water, "You broke every promise you ever made to me. Why should I keep a one sided promise?" I asked looking down at the angry water. It seemed to call my name with every crash, _**Bella...Bella...Bella!**_

"_Bella, Please?" _he begged.

I shook my head to no one, "Goodbye Edward, I will always love you. Find your happiness, even if it wasn't me," I said then jumped, letting the water have me.

I held my breath as a natural reaction I saw a vision of Edward in the water, he was shaking his head at me. _Go to hell_ I thought then felt my consciousness slipping away. My vision blacked and I felt the water invade my lungs. My eyes slid shut as my heart beat slowed.

I was suddenly watching my own body drown. Jake appeared out of the murk, grabbing my body and began to drag me to shore. _NO!_ I thought. _LET ME DIE!_

I followed him to shore, my feet though never hit the ground. It was almost like I was floating. I didn't want to worry about that. I just wanted to see if I would get my wish of staying dead. Though I was still confused about how I was watching this, but again, I didn't worry about it now.

"Come on Bella! Don't give up" Jake begged as he gave me CPR. "Breathe come on!"

Sam leaned down and checked my pulse, "She's already gone Jake, we were too late," he said.

"No! She can't be!" he said continuing CPR.

Sam put his hand on Jake's shoulder, "she doesn't have a pulse...it's too late."

"NO!" Jake cried then held my body sobbing.

If I was really dead then how was I here now? When I looked at the ground I did see my feet...well more like through them, to see that I really was floating.

"What the?" I said, but my words even though I shouted them, came out like a whisper. Like the kind when you think you hear something on the breeze. The only explanation that my now insane mind could come up with was that I was a ghost. No I can't be...yet the evidence did seem over whelming.

"I'm going to get Charlie," Sam said standing. "Break the news. Poor guy, first Harry now Bella," he mumbled the last part.

Harry was dead? Oh no! If I had known that I would have waited. Within minutes Charlie took Jake's place sobbing and holding my lifeless body. He sobbed 'my baby' over and over.

I held my head in my hands, not paying attention to how I could actually see though my hands. How could I have done this to my own father! Why was I so selfish? I wailed into the sky, it came out like a howl of wind as thunder and lightning broke the sky open.

I wanted to be home in my bed. Back to normal. As soon as I thought it, I was in my room and hovering over my bed. I tried to fall onto it but ended up hovering about a 5 inches from my quilt. I began to cry. As tears rolled down my cheeks they disappeared, only reminding me of my previous deeds. As I thought of Jacob, my friends, my mom, the rest of the school, and most of all Edward I cried harder, wailing and balling. The storm outside raging, winds howled against my window.

Charlie didn't come home that night, or the next day. He did come home a few days later, looking exhausted. He was wearing the only suit he owned, one with a tie way too wide and the suit itself too small for him. I floated on the banister looking out watching Charlie get my school pictures from the walls, he was still crying, and it got worse each time he looked at my picture. He put each picture in a box on the table then went up to my room, I floated behind him curious weather he was already cleaning my stuff out.

He put the box on my bed then looked around taking a deep breath, "I don't know why you did it Bells. I hope it was nothing I did, but I can't help but blame myself," he said tears escaping his eyes. "I swear Bells, if I ever see that Cullen kid again, he better hope I left my gun at home."

I wanted to tell him it wasn't, but my voice was too soft for him to hear. I didn't care, I said it anyway, "Dad it was nothing you did. It was all me, all Edward..." I paused then began to cry causing my next words to come out in a loud wail, "IT WAS EDWARDS FAULT!" I gasped for more air and continued, "HE BROKE ALL HIS PROMISES!"

Charlie stopped, holding my copy of Withering Heights, "Bella?" he asked.

HE HEARD ME! Part of my was overjoyed at the human contact, but another...new part dominated, making me shrink into a wall. I hovered in the wall between my room and the outside hall. he sighed and put the book in the box, sighing and mumbling something about hearing voices. He then got some of my other favorite books and some of my favorite CD's. When he got to my closet he frowned.

Oh I know what he was doing, getting things for my funeral. I hoped he would chose my favorite pair of jeans and that blue knit sweater that I like. I at least wanted to be comfortable in death. He did just as I hoped. I followed him out of the house, slipping into the cruiser when he opened the door. I floated in the back seat.

It's not every day you can go to your own funeral, I did though and guilt for my actions built up, all of my friends were there talking about me (in good terms I assure you), Jake stood with his father, his face was hard but I saw a few tears escape. Renee was there too, holding Phil like she would fall if she didn't.

I hovered over a tomb stone in a sitting position and held my face in my hands, What have I done?

Mr. Webber gave a speech, then dad, then a few of my really good friends. Some songs were sung then they put my coffin into the ground. People threw flowers or dropped a handful of dirt. Jake stepped up with a white rose, "Bells, I promise you. Edward Cullen will pay. Screw the treaty. Next time we see him, we will rip him to shreds," he said then threw the rose with an 'I love you.'

He used the pack plural, and for once, I was glad of his plan. In my mind Edward deserved to die. Hopefully he wouldn't join me in this. I hoped he would go straight to hell.

When everyone was gone and my body was fully buried I sat in front of my tombstone and read it over and over. They had my full name on the first line then _Bella_ under it. The date I was born when I died. Then they had, a loving daughter with a broken heart.

I sighed then realized I wasn't alone. I turned then flew through my tombstone and hid behind it.

Alice walked over looking around like she was looking for someone, "I'm going to feel so ridiculous," she mumbled. Then louder, "Bella? I know you're here, come out?" she asked. She knows? "Bella, please I need your help, it's Edward."

Even if I hated him, I still loved Alice. I poked my head out from behind my tombstone she was still looking around, "Bella, please!" She begged.

I came out from behind my tombstone completely but was still looking around "Bella, he's going to the Volturi. He's going to ask them to kill him. Please help me! I know you must hate him but Please!" she begged dry sobbing.

I didn't know how to help her see me. How would a ghost do that?

I remembered back to when I...well...died. I had wanted to be in my room. I had an idea...it was most likely wrong, but worth a try. _I want Alice to see me...I want Alice to hear me_ I thought adding the last part just in-case.

"BELLA!" Alice shrieked. I heard her run at me and felt her run through me. It felt like she was passing through cobwebs...even if that doesn't make sense. She turned back to me, "Oh right," she said. Then shook her head, "Why Bella?" she asked.

I hoped my thing with wanting her to hear me and see me would work, "I couldn't stand it," I said quietly.

Her eyes were said, "I told him," she mumbled angrily, then turned back to me, "Will you help me then Bella?" she asked. "I know you probably hate him right now but..." I cut her off.

"I will help you Alice," I said simply. She nodded then waited for me to follow her. I turned back to my tombstone, "I might have been selfish in my past actions, but I will do what ever I can to reconcile for them." I said then flew towards Alice who ran at her normal speed. I was excited to see that I could keep up or even pass her.

**

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I debated with myself weather I should make it longer or not, but I finally decided to stop here. You probably deserve more then that for having to wait for so long (hangs head guiltily). Review and let me know what you think. Feel free to ask questions! I love questions!**

**Luv**

**RWH**


	2. I NEED A COAUTHOR!

**Authors Note****:**

**Hi! I know I hate these too but I've made a hard decision. The following stories are up for adoption:**

**Almost Dead**

**Golden Eyes**

**I See Dead People**

**Nitro**

**No One Lives Forever**

**When You Say Nothing at All**

**The requirements are: **

**1) You must have a completed story in the Category. If it is a crossover you need to have read both book series and have one completed story for one or the other. **

**2) Write in English.**

**3) Keep the major conflict. I will tell you when I choose you. **

**4) Don't Kill any major characters unless it's part of the plot. **

**5) Finally, Keep me in the loop. Let me know if you write a sequel, or just ask me to Beta, I would be happy to.**

**The following stories I need a Co-Author:**

**When You're gone**

**The Requirements are:**

**1) You Must like or enjoy Slash stories. **

**2) Write in English.**

**3) Have a completed Slash story in Twilight. (not really required but it will help your chances.)**

**I'm sorry if I have let you down. I hate that I have to write this. but I got in over my head, and it caused me to loose interest in my stories. I have so much other stuff going on at the same time with my life that I have no time for them. Again, I'M SO SORRY!**


	3. Chapter 2

**Authors Note****: **

**Hello! How are we? Thank you to all who reviewed! I love you all!**

**Read on and don't forget to Review? ;)**

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Chapter Two- Reconciliation

Bella POV

Alice had us...well her a seat on a plane with in the hour, while I just floated in the isle at least until I found out Alice didn't have a neighbor then I took the seat. I found that only Alice could see me on the plane. I guess it was because I had only wanted Alice to see and hear me.

Alice had to speak quietly on the plane almost a whisper and not look at me to avoid any unwanted attention. She told me how things were when they left. How Edward left them and wandered, "he was lifeless, Bella. Like he would never see the sun shine again," much like how I acted before I died. "He called once every few months, and visited once sense we left. He happened to be visiting when I saw you..." she paused I nodded as the plane took off. "He saw you die before the _dog_ made it vanish," she said, then sighed, "I can't let him die Bella, even after all he's done I can't condone it. It would break the family even further apart then they already are. Emmett and Rose went to Africa, and Carlisle and Esmé went to Canada. Jasper and I have been with his friends Peter and Charlett in the south." she said looking down, "You were the glue that held us together."

Her words made me feel even worse about my deeds. The sunny day soon turned rainy, "I can't undo the past, as much as I want to now," I said. "I can't believe I did this, how could I have been so selfish?" I said putting my head in my hands again.

I felt Alice's hand on my translucent shoulder...well through my shoulder, "Like you said Bella, you can't change the past, but you _can _change the future," she said. The rain came harder outside. "One thing I don't understand though, why are you a ghost? Why didn't you move on to whatever afterlife there is?"

I shrugged, "I don't know," I stopped because the stewardess came by and asked Alice if she wanted a drink which she refused. "I didn't really care at the time either, as long as I was dead," I said and took a deep breath, "I think I've gotten used to being a ghost though, it's kinda fun sometimes. Depending on my emotions I can effect the weather around me, and the going through things is fun too," I said.

The rest of the flight I talked with Alice and while she pretended to sleep I played a few pranks...what can I say? I'm a ghost, we like to mess with you. I couldn't wait to see one of the pranks play out. I had switched the luggage in the over head bins. So now the bags on the right side of the plane were now on the left. I had left Alice's bag where she put it though. One point during the flight I explored the baggage area under the cabin, where I had found a dog to entertain.

As soon as the plane docked at the gate I flew through the walls to the parking area. _Car...car...wait, fast car_ I thought. I didn't know much about cars, but I knew when I spotted a Porsche that it was a fast car. I willed the doors to unlock and flew in, willing the car to start. _This doing things with my will is SO cool!_ I thought as I navigated to the pick up area, "Alice!" I called, knowing she would here me. Seconds later she appeared, "Customs was a bitch," she said getting into the driver seat, "It didn't speed anything up that you switched the over head luggage bins," she said. I grinned as I flew into the passenger side and she pealed out of the airport. "Why didn't you just...poof there?" Alice asked.

"Because I can only do that to places I've been to before, I've never been to Italy," I explained. I found this out when Charlie didn't come home the first few nights.

She nodded and the rest of the drive to Voltaira was silent. When we neared the town Edward had moved up his plans, "You need to get to the clock tower before the last chime at noon," Alice said.

I nodded, "I'll get him safe Alice," I said. I cringed when she almost hit someone. Then the crowd got too thick for her to drive anymore.

"REMEMBER THE CLOCK TOWER!" she yelled as I flew out of the car.

The clock started to bong, I flew faster fallowing the moving crowd. I was going faster then I ever did when I got to an opening, a plaza. Across from me was a clock tower and Edward. If I had been alive I would have had a heart attack. He was starting to unbutton his shirt. _Let Edward Hear and See me_! I thought and continued to fly through people to him I only had three bongs left, "EDWARD!" I shouted.

He closed his eyes and a smile came to his face, "My Bella," he whispered.

I then came into View of him, "EDWARD!" I shouted again. He looked up this time.

"Bella?" he asked as I went through him into the building.

"Come to me," I said. His jaw was dropped as he followed my voice. Once he was through the doors I willed them shut. His head darted around as the last bong on the clock sounded. Once I knew he was safe, my anger rose. The wind outside got worse than it had been, screaming against the doors. "I can't believe you!" I shouted at him. "I can't preach anything about suicide...but don't. Don't be as selfish as I was."

"Bella?" he asked again. He seemed to be at a loss for words.

I growled and thunder boomed outside,_ shit, I need to calm down before I cause a storm._ I thought. "Yes, Edward I'm Bella, well it's complicated but in easy terms, I'm Bella. You can't do this. Please!" I yelled.

A shocked look crossed his face, "I heard your thoughts," he whispered.

"Of course you did, I'm dead," I said bluntly. "My body was blocked to you, not my spirit."

"Alice was right though...Your..." he couldn't finish it.

"Yep," I floated above him, "Dead as a doornail." I said.

"Why won't you let me join you?" he asked.

I frowned still floating above him, "Your family is already ripping apart I don't want it to get worse. I did this to myself and I've regretted it every second. I don't you to feel the same," I said. "I had to watch my father get my funeral ready, watch him hold my body and sob like a baby. I don't want you to hurt your family or feel this guilt," I said the storm I had been causing had stopped but the sun was still covered. "It's not worth it."

"How will I go on though? I don't think I can be without you," he said defeated.

I floated on my stomach at eye level to him, my head on my folded arms was cocked. "I thought you didn't love me anymore?" I asked, it was my turn to be confused.

"I lied Bella, I could never not love you. I always did and always will," he said, "What I've done to you is beyond unforgivable, 'I'm sorry' will never be enough," he said.

I shook my head, "One thing death has taught me Edward, Life is too short to hold a grudge, and I'm not leaving you guys. When I was dieing I hoped you would find happiness, I'm not going to give up on you until you find that happiness," I said. "So sorry, but your stuck with me."

Doors to my left opened reveling two more vampires. I wasn't used to not being seen so I flew into the ceiling. "Edward, good, you haven't left yet," said one with dark hair. "Aro wishes to see you."

"I haven't broken any laws," he stated. I came out of the ceiling and Edward watched me fly in front of the other vampire whom had blonde hair.

"You're kinda ugly aren't you?" I said to the male. I knew Edward had a look of shock in his eyes. He of course did nothing. I frowned and cocked my head then made a face at him. "So stoic...Mr. Serious," I said mockingly then went over to the other vampire. "You're even uglier, but you look like you think you have a big dick when really it's too small to see."

I looked back at Edward and smiled. He had shock in his eyes. Dark haired guy looked at him confused, "Follow us," he said.

Edward came out of his shock and said, "I think not gentlemen," he buttoned his shirt up and backed up to the doors. The latch on the door broke and Alice came in an anxious look on her face. Then relaxed when she saw me floating in front of the two goons. "Now boys lets play nice," she said. I flew over to her and asked if they were going to see Aro. She didn't get to answer.

"Enough," a little blonde girl Edward looked defeated. "What's going on here?" she demanded.

"You showed up," I said, crossing my legs and arms floating by Alice's head. "Seriously...height challenged much?"

"Bella!" Alice said too loud.

The blond girl cocked her head, "who?" she asked.

"Nothing Jane," Alice said quickly.

Jane's eyes narrowed, "Wasn't 'Bella' the name of Edward's dead girlfriend?" she asked.

"What of it Bitch?" I said getting in her face.

Alice hid her fear well, "it was," she said.

"Let's go," she said turning around. "Aro is waiting."

I followed next to Alice, "Why are we following her? What's her damage?" I asked.

Alice's answer was a quiet whisper, "Her power."

A loud voice shouted, "Welcome Back Edward!"

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So? What will happen? Well, I know but do you? **

**Review?**

**Luv, **

**RWH**


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